Your Complete Guide for How to Build Your Professional Network

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Most people view networking as a means to an end — getting a job offer or at the very least, a referral. If this is your only view of networking, it’s time to expand your view.

For one thing, if you are only focused on what you can get out of networking — a job — then you probably won’t be very successful at it. If you have nothing to offer, or only view it as a transactional relationship, then you won’t attract many folks who are interested in networking with you and building an ongoing relationship, and — more importantly — helping you out. I find that the more I am willing to help others, the more I encounter others who are willing to help me.

The goal of networking is building relationships, usually (but not always) based on your professional experiences and commonalities. Additionally, the goal is to have a solid professional network in place before you need it, so that you already have folks willing to help you out when asked (or offer help before you even need to ask).

The Benefits of Networking

What are the ways you can benefit from networking? Of course, getting a referral for a potential job is a big benefit of networking. But there are other benefits as well:

Company Insights: If you are interviewing with a company, a contact you know who works or has worked there might be willing to share their unfiltered view, and might also give you insight into things like what you can negotiate if you receive an offer, how to navigate the company culture, etc.

Training and Education Insights: Navigating all the different training or educational opportunities available can be overwhelming. Talking to someone who is currently or was enrolled in a program you’re considering can be very insightful for you to figure out if it is a good option to help achieve your goals.

Job Path Realities: What does it really like to land your goal job? You can look at job descriptions, but what skills do folks in these roles really need to know? What are the interviews like? Does having an advanced degree give you an advantage? What does it take to stand out as a candidate, or get a promotion in the future? Talking to people further along in your career path can be very helpful.

Interview Prep: Every industry and company has a different format for interviewing. Also answering interview questions is a skill in and of itself. You can practice interviewing with other folks in your field, especially if they have experience in your target roles and/or have interviewed at your target companies. Additionally, you can find out what the interview process is really like at certain companies — what questions can you expect? Will there be a technical challenge? Etc.

Mentorship: A mentor can provide guidance as you are trying to navigate a new career path or achieve a new career milestone. Your professional network is a great place to find a mentor, whether that is someone you’ve already met or someone that a contact of yours can recommend.

Finding Candidates: At some point in your career, you might be a hiring manager, and you will be in a position to hire people for your team. While it is hard to be a candidate trying to find a job, it is also hard trying to find the right candidate for an open role. Having a robust network can help you find qualified candidates who have already been vetted by people you know and trust.

Getting a Referral Bonus: Similarly, even if you aren’t a hiring manager, many companies offer referral bonuses if you refer a candidate who ends up getting hired. At some companies, this can be worth hundreds or thousands of dollars. The bigger your network, the more likely you will know someone who will be a good fit for a job opening.

What Networking Should and Should Not Be

Most folks who don’t like networking view it as awkward events surrounded by strangers or awkward cold messages to strangers on LinkedIn or asking for favors or having sterile conversations.

If this is what you think networking is … you’re doing it wrong. And you’re wasting your time.

Networking is simply meeting people and getting to know them. The people you’re networking with are just normal people like you and me. Yes, you’re often meeting them in a professional setting so you might feel that you have to behave a certain way or can only talk about professional things, but that’s not true. Yes, your professional lives might be the first thing that you identify as a commonality, but that doesn’t mean you can’t get to know someone beyond just their professional life.

Additionally, if you’re only networking with total strangers — you’re wasting your time. While occasionally reaching out to complete strangers can be useful, it’s far more effective to network with someone with who you have some kind of connection to, even if it’s small. More on that under “Where to Find People to Network With.”

When and How Often to Network

When to Start

Networking is something you should start doing as soon as possible and never stop. That doesn’t mean you need to be attending events every week or reaching out to people every day. Just that it’s never too soon to start, and it’s something that you should never stop doing.

If you’re in school and/or still training for or have not yet started your career, you should be networking with your fellow students, alumni, and people you meet during your internships. If you have time, you should attend industry events in your city or virtual events.

If you’re already working, you should be continuing to develop relationships with people you’ve met professionally and also connecting with new folks. Additionally, networking with students who reach out to you can also be beneficial — someday they will be working and might be at a company you’re interested in, or they will gain experiences that you can learn from.

Also, networking doesn’t have to be forced. And it can happen in settings other than networking events or other professional spaces. For example, I’ve networked with folks I’ve met through book clubs and group workouts.

Here’s a secret — networking is merely talking to people. It can happen anywhere.

How Often

How often should you be networking? Well, it really depends on how much time you have.

Personally, I try to:

• Engage in conversations in relevant Slack & Discord communities daily (during the work week).
• Attend at least 1–2 “live” events per month whether in-person or virtual synchronous events.
• Schedule at least 1–2 virtual or in-person 1:1 meetings per month with someone new or with an established connection.

Additionally, I respond to messages frequently from people interested in connecting with me, as long as it seems like connecting will be worth my time and/or theirs. Don’t forget that people who want to network with you can also be a useful connection for you at some point! Remember that networking should be a two-way street and you never know who can help you out in the future.

Where to Find People to Network With

Online places for networking

Slack and Discord communities are great for networking. There are so many communities out there for various industries, niches, groups, etc. If you’re interested in data & analytics, I’ve compiled a list here. Otherwise, just search Google for “slack” or ‘discord” plus your industry or job function. Most online communities are very welcoming to students or folks who are still transitioning to that industry or job function. There is often no “qualification” to join a Slack or Discord community with the exception of those that are limited to specific identity groups (women, etc).

LinkedIn Groups are another option but have mixed results. Many groups aren’t well-moderated and/or don’t have anyone to foster connections, so they end up being dormant, and/or taken over by spam posts. While they’re certainly worth checking out, I personally haven’t had as much luck building genuine connections through them.

Engaging with LinkedIn content can also be useful, although sometimes there is a lot of noise on LinkedIn and folks are just trying to be seen and not necessarily create meaningful connections. But commenting on content that is relevant to your industry can be a good way to find new people to connect with. Read the other comments and if you find someone who might be a good connection, reply or send them a message. (If you send a connection request, mention that you are connecting via the post/comment through and why you think connecting with be beneficial.)

Most universities have an online alumni directory, search yours for people working in your target roles or target companies or industries. Reach out to them via your alumni directory platform or LinkedIn.

Additionally, there are lots of folks on other social media platforms (Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, etc) who are posting relevant professional or industry-specific content. Following them and engaging with them and/or their followers can also be useful. Creating your own content — especially if it’s quality content that others will find useful — can also help you grow your network.

Finally, there are other online communities that exist on their own platforms. Google can be a great way to discover other online communities related to your industry, especially communities related to specific identity groups.

Offline places for networking

MeetUp is a great resource for finding in-person (or virtual synchronous) events for networking. Search meetup.com for terms and topics related to your industry and join the groups that look relevant to you and attend their events.

The online communities listed above — Slack, Discord, LinkedIn, etc — will sometimes have their own events, typically over Zoom but some have location-specific channels for large cities. Often members will plan their own casual in-person meetup events.

Additionally, if you attended a university, see if there are alumni events in your city and attend those. If you’re currently attending university, start building professional relationships with your classmates. The people who were good mates on group projects — keep in touch with them via email and/or LinkedIn. The students who speak up and seem to understand the curriculum — connect with them, and try to do group projects with them.

Also if you’re a current student, join student groups, especially ones relevant to your major or target industry. The folks showing up for these groups are usually very motivated and likely the types who will land good jobs in the future. You want these students in your professional network. (Bonus: student groups are a great resource for developing the “soft” skills that many entry-level folks lack. Try to get a leadership role with a student group so you can start working on these skills.)

If you’re currently working, remember that your coworkers are a great resource for networking. Even if you don’t feel comfortable letting them know that you’re interested in a job elsewhere (or you’re not currently trying to leave your current job), it’s still good to build relationships now for the future. Make note of which coworkers seem very motivated and accomplished, or are working in your target roles if you want to make a career switch, these are people who will likely be good for your network in the future. If you don’t regularly work with them directly, ask them to meet for a coffee chat or have lunch together.

Finally, remember that people who you meet elsewhere can be good professional contacts. You never know who in your intramural sports team or running club for example also works in your industry or for your dream company. So make sure you are getting to know these folks and chatting with them and see who you meet.

How to Successfully Network Online

Slack and Discord communities

First, look through all the channels to familiarize yourself with the topics that are frequently discussed. Join the channels that are of interest or relevant to you. Also, set preferences if you’d like alerts anytime someone uses a certain keyword, like the city you live in or the target companies you’d like to work for.

Many Slack communities use the “donut” bot for random pairings — these are great opportunities for networking, so make sure to join these channels and follow up when the bot pairs you with someone.

If there is an “introduction” channel, make a post introducing yourself, and include your LinkedIn profile so people can connect with you. Keep an eye on the introduction channel and follow up with any interesting new folks who join.

Regularly engage in conversations. I personally try to check my favorite online communities daily or at least a few times per week. Reply to posts, ask questions, post relevant content, and remember this is meant to be an ongoing conversation and a two-way street. If you start posting and replying regularly, people will recognize you, and if you post quality content or responses, people will be receptive to connecting with you or be the one to ask to connect further.

If you engage with someone who you think will be a good connection — maybe you’re in the same city or work in identical roles or have something else in common — reach out to them and ask if you can connect over LinkedIn and/or schedule some time to chat 1:1 over Zoom.

Also, lots of online communities have channels for posting job opportunities — if someone posts a role that interests you, or is at a company that does interest you — reply and ask if you can follow up with them directly with questions. If they are open to it, send them a private message and ask about the role and/or company. Ask for a referral if you’re interested in applying for the job. Also if they are working in a similar role as you (or the type of role you’d like to be in), ask if you can schedule a 15-minute chat over Zoom. If they are in a different type of role, ask if they’d be able to connect you with someone who is working in your target role at their company.

Sending Cold Messages

A “cold” message is basically an unsolicited message sent to a complete stranger you’ve never met. It usually has the lowest response rate of all messages, so it’s better to find a way to connect with folks before messaging them — for example, through Slack or Discord communities, a mutual contact, your alumni network, or attending an event.

Basically, before you start putting effort into finding strangers to cold contact — try all of the other options mentioned in this guide.

Regardless, some tips for cold messages:

• Establish some kind of connection — did you attend the same university? Do you have something in common — for example, if you’re both women working in analytics or you’re making a career pivot similar to what they’ve done? Make sure to mention that at the start of the message.
• If you have a mutual contact, ask them to make an introduction instead of sending a cold message.
• Let them know why you’re contacting them — be specific and brief. For example, maybe they attended a graduate program you are considering applying to and you would like to know what their experience was. Or maybe you have a similar background and you are interested in doing the type of work they do now. The more specific you are, the more likely they are to respond.
• Include a specific “ask” — what do you want to get from them? A 15-minute Zoom call? A chance to send them some questions and get their answers in writing?

Things not to do in a cold message:

• Don’t send a brief message that is simply “hi” or “hi, how are you?” The receiver has no idea what your intentions are (are you going to sell them something? Hit on them?) and is less likely to reply.
• Don’t ask vague questions that are open-ended and have no context. For example “I’m interested in a career in data analytics, do you have any advice for me?” is hard to answer. I don’t know your background or your goals. I don’t know what kind of advice will actually be useful for you.
• Don’t be mad or offended if you don’t get a response. People are busy. They might not check their LinkedIn messages. They might not know how to reply to you (see point above about vague questions).
• Don’t try to guess their email address and contact them that way. It’s weird and creepy. Message them on the platform where you found them (LinkedIn, Twitter, Alumni directory, etc).
• Don’t ask for a job referral in your first message.

Example of a good cold message:

Hi Contact, thank you for reading my message. I’m currently working in marketing and am interested in making a career pivot to analytics — I noticed you have done a similar pivot. I’m considering different training and educational resources to make this career pivot, and I was wondering if I could ask you some questions, either over messages or via a 15-minute Zoom call? Thank you.

How to Successfully Network in Person

Attending Events

Attending in-person events can be awkward, however, it’s still worth doing. I’ve tried a few things to make it feel less awkward or at least, be worth my time despite the awkwardness.

Invite someone to join me. Those Slack and Discord communities you joined? Do they have a location-specific channel for your city? Post a link to any upcoming related events you’re planning to attend and ask if anyone else will be there or would like to join you.

Be selective about the events you attend. Events that have a very general or broad topic are less useful than an event that is specific to an industry, job function, or another niche (such as targeted to women or students). The more specific the event, the easier it is to find people at the event with whom you have something in common. For example, I have more luck making useful connections at events focused on data analytics than events targeting the entire tech industry.

Accept that it’ll be awkward. If I’m mentally prepared for awkwardness, it’s a little bit easier and I’m less fixated on how I feel.

Set a goal. I usually tell myself at the start of the event that I can’t leave until I have a conversation with at least one person to the point that we connect on LinkedIn or I get their contact information. Setting accountability goals like that can be helpful.

Remember that others feel the same way. Lots of folks at in-person events feel just as awkward as you do. Usually, this means that they will be so distracted by how awkward they feel, that they won’t notice if you act awkward yourself. But also, most people don’t care if you seem a little awkward. Also if you see someone hanging out alone, they’re likely trying to muster up the courage to talk to someone or hoping that someone will talk to them — so help them out and go talk to them.

Remember that the point of the event is to talk to people. Yes, it can feel awkward or scary to go up to a stranger and ask them a question or try to join a group that is already conversing. But that is the whole point of the event, so if you can’t do those things at a networking event, where can you? Talking to strangers is literally the point of these events.

Start asking questions. Most people love talking about themselves. Asking questions is a good way to get a conversation started with someone. Questions I typically ask (with some follow-up questions).

• What do you do, where do you work? How long have you been there?
• Do you like working there? Are they a good employer? (Might as well get some useful information for any future job searches while you’re at it.)
• What projects are you working on right now?
• Where do you study? What did/do you study? What are you learning right now?
• Did you do a thesis or a capstone project? What was the subject?
• Have you been to this event before?
• Do you attend any other events like this? (This is also a great way to find other meetup groups.)
• (If the event included a presentation or something) What did you think of the presentation/the speakers?
• Do you have any plans this weekend? What do you like to do when you aren’t working?
• Have you traveled recently? Have any upcoming travel plans?

Yes, you’re allowed to talk about things other than your careers at networking events.

Connect on LinkedIn before you end the conversation. If you start chatting with someone, before you part, ask if you can connect on LinkedIn. I usually take out my phone and open the LinkedIn app and make the connection right there, just so I make sure that I find the correct profile, and so I don’t have to try to remember their name later.

Follow up. A few days or a week later, if there was someone I met at the event that I think will be good for my network, I’ll follow up (usually via LinkedIn message, unless we exchanged emails or something) and ask if they’d like to meet up for coffee or happy hour or a quick Zoom chat. Or if I’m planning to attend a similar event in the near future, ask if they’ll be attending that event and/or would like to join me.

Scheduling a 1:1 Meeting

If you’ve reached out to someone and have been able to schedule a 1:1 meeting with them in person or over Zoom, what should you talk about during the meeting?

To make sure it’s an efficient use of your time and theirs, write up a list of questions or topics you’d like to discuss. The more specific the better. To be honest when someone asks me open-ended and vague questions like “what advice do you have for me?” as their first question, I really don’t know how to answer. So think specifically about what it is about this person’s background or experience that you want to learn from, and start with questions about that. It’s up to you if you want to send the list of questions/topics in advance, they might be able to give you better responses if they’ve had more time to think about the topics.

Make sure you are respectful of their time. Show up on time. When you get to 1–2 minutes before the end of your scheduled time, start wrapping up, and set expectations for what’s next — do you want to meet again? Do you want to keep things open-ended so that you can follow up when you have more questions?

So you’ve connected — now what?

Making a connection is step one for networking. However, it’s important to keep the professional relationship going so that if/when one of you needs something from the other in the future (such as a job referral or other favor), you have a relationship already formed and they are more willing to help. Often, the occasional message or comment on LinkedIn is enough. If they post an update on LinkedIn — maybe they got a new job — that’s always a good opportunity to send a message to congratulate them and ask how it’s going.

If you want to meet up again, I think doing so every 6–12 months is enough if the person is strictly a professional contact. If you are in the same location, send them a message every few months or so to ask how they’re doing and ask if they’d like to meet to catch up, perhaps over coffee or at happy hour. If you’re not in the same location (or it’s easier for one or both of you), meeting over Zoom or another video platform is also a good option.

Keeping notes in between meetings is never a bad idea. I personally have a Google Spreadsheet where I keep track of all the people I consider important members of my professional network. I make note of how we originally met, and then the date and any notes from our subsequent meetings.

Asking for a referral

While there are other benefits to having someone in your network, the biggest is job referrals. But when can you ask someone for a referral?

Don’t ask someone for a referral in your very first message or at the beginning of your very first conversation with them. Remember that people put their reputations on the line when they make a referral, and most people aren’t willing to do that for a complete stranger.

The goal is to get to know people first, before you need or want to ask for a referral. So focus first on meeting people and getting to know them professionally. That way when you identify that they could provide you with a referral for a job you’re interested in, the relationship has already been built and doesn’t feel one-sided. This is why I always recommend to students that they start networking with alumni and other people as soon as possible. Not when they are in their last semester and job hunting. If you’re already in your career, start networking now. Don’t wait until you’re ready to leave your job to start.

However, if you’re networking while job searching, it’s fine to casually mention that you’re job searching. Personally, I’d recommend working that into the conversion, but don’t yet outright ask for a referral. Just put it out there, and there’s a chance they might offer to be a referral before you need to ask, or they might mention an opening at their company.

Additionally, don’t ask for a referral unless you’ve identified a specific job opening that you’re interested in at their company. Unless someone works for a very small company, they probably aren’t aware of exactly what roles are open beyond their immediate team. So throwing out a general “let me know if there are any openings at your company that would be a good fit for me” — is a waste. A large company might have hundreds if not thousands of openings at a given time, and you can’t expect a person to be aware of all of them, especially if the company has lots of different departments/teams/etc. It also comes across as expecting them to do the leg work of your job search for you, which might be a turnoff and make them less likely to want to help.

Instead, after you’ve met someone, check the openings at their company on LinkedIn and/or the company website. If you find a specific opening that you’re interested in, send them a message like this:

Hi Contact, it was so great to chat with you. I was checking the open roles on [company name’s] website/LinkedIn and noticed there is an opening for [job title]. I’m planning to apply and was wondering if you know anything about this role? [Include the link to the job ad.]

Often, they’ll offer to make a referral without you needing to ask. If they don’t, you can reply to their response by asking how their company handles referrals. (Some companies have a pro-active format, others just have a field on the application form where you can list their name.)

How has networking benefited your career?

Any other tips you’d like to share?

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